Building Can Be Hard
But walking alone makes it harder.
For some time now, I’ve been asking myself the big question — why am I really doing this? Why am I building? Why am I choosing this hard path?
I remember texting one of my friends — a serial founder — and simply saying, “Building can be hard.” I wasn’t trying to spark any deep conversation. I just needed someone to see me, to get it. Because honestly, some days, I feel like I’m pouring everything into something no one else fully understands.
Where I come from, building isn’t the norm. If anything, it’s an interruption. You’re sent to school to read your book. After a few years, you’re expected to graduate, maybe serve, and find a job. That’s the script, the expectation and anything outside of that, you’re on your own.
And yet, here I am towing this unfamiliar, unpredictable path.
Sometimes, it feels like nobody is building around me, like I’m walking this road alone. But other times, it seems like everyone is building something, launching something, growing something. It’s a weird in-between.
To make things more layered, I’m a multi-potentialite. I’m not just building one thing, I build many things, sometimes at once. Some seasons, I’m juggling two, three, four projects and I love them all such that when I work on one, I pour myself in completely. Then, when I switch to another, I give it everything too. It’s like I’m living five lives in one body, with the same 24 hours everyone else has.
You might see me and think, “Wow, she has it all together” but the truth is, I’m tired. Not every day, but often enough. There are days I feel like I’m hanging by a thread but because I smile, because I show up dressed well, because I speak with some kind of confidence, people assume I’m fine. They don’t see the chaos behind the curtain and sometimes, their compliments sound like pity in disguise.
But what nobody really talks about is the uncertainty that comes with building. There’s no guarantee. No clear road. No map. Most days, I feel like I’m walking blindfolded, hands outstretched, hoping to feel my way forward.
And when I do try to rest — not even a proper rest, just a scroll-through-Instagram-and-stare-at-the-ceiling kind of rest — I feel guilty. Like I’m wasting time. Like I should be doing more yet, I know I shouldn’t be hard on myself.
Funny thing is, I still consider myself new to all this. Just the other day, I remembered sitting at the feet of Filip during the Campus Labs Nigeria Accelerator Program. Back then, I was just learning what a customer persona was, how to conduct market research, and what product-market fit even meant. It feels like forever ago and yet like yesterday.
I’m not writing this to complain. I’m just trying to be honest. To say it as it is. Because if you’re thinking of walking this same path — building something of your own, chasing a different kind of life — I don’t want to lie to you. It’s hard. Some days, you’ll want to quit. Other days, you’ll feel like a fraud. But there’s one thing that’s helping me survive this builder’s journey:
God.
You can’t walk this kind of path alone. You just can’t. You can try, but you’ll burn out. You’ll lose sight of why you started. And when those hard days come (and trust me, they will), you’ll have no one to hold you up.
God brought people into my life who became lifelines. Friends I can call when I feel like quitting. People who pray with me, remind me of who I am and make me reflect on why I started. Without them, this road would be unbearable.
So yes, building is hard but knowing you’re not alone makes it just a little bit easier. And on the days it gets too hard to keep going, I choose to remember: I am called to build for a reason.
I may not look like what I am going through. I may smile through the pressure but my work matters and my journey counts.
And someday soon, when it all starts to make sense, I’ll be grateful I didn’t stop.